Once upon a time there was a caveman named Carl. Carl was happy. He slept in his own cave which was warm at night and cool in the day. When Carl was hungry, he crept outside and explored the plentiful vegetation that lay all around him. There were fruit trees, nut trees, berry bushes and all kinds of interesting foods that grew from the ground like mushrooms, onions and watermelon. Carl ate what he liked and never once thought of hoarding these foods because his mind was occupied with peace and joy. When he was not eating, Carl either made things out of rocks, sticks and dirt, or he took long naps. Sometimes, he would be hungry when it was dark outside so he fumbled around under the moonlit sky to a tree which had fruit that he liked and he would eat. He smiled even though no other caveperson was around to see him.
One day, Carl spotted another caveman eating from one of the nearby trees. A few feelings came over Carl that he had never felt before. At first, he felt excited to see another caveman who was doing the same things Carl would do. He could relate to this other caveman, and it made Carl feel welcomed. Carl knew that eating felt good and since he liked doing it, he imagined that the other caveman liked doing it too. He crept out of his cave and bounded over to the other caveman excited to eat fruit with him. The two looked at each other for a moment, then looked at the tree; there was one piece of fruit left on it. Both reached out at the same time to grab it. Both took ahold of part of it. Carl tugged the fruit toward him. The other caveman tugged back. Soon, the two of them were struggling on the ground. There was biting, clawing, and punching until both of them were exhausted and bleeding. Badly wounded from each other, Carl went back to his cave, and the other caveman left the garden, returning to whence he came.
Carl couldn’t believe what had happened. He was jittery, shaking, and sore. Then a new feeling swept over him. Carl realized that if this other caveman was eating and enjoying the same food that Carl had, maybe there wouldn’t be enough for Carl when he became hungry again. Carl freaked out. This was a very foreign feeling, but it made Carl feel very powerful and caused a rush of energy. “What if there isn’t enough for me” kept running through his mind as he remembered this other caveman taking and eating the fruit that Carl liked. Carl thought that if he saw this other caveman again he might throw a rock at him, but then imagined missing, and the other caveman might throw it back and not miss. Next , he thought he might go make some scary noises in the bushes hoping that the other caveman would get scared and run away. But then he thought it could be embarrassing if the other caveman didn’t run away and found him there snorting and wheezing in the bushes. Carl didn’t know what to do, but all he could think about was “What if there isn’t enough left for me?” Out of desperation, Carl crept out of his cool cave into the hot sun. All afternoon and evening the only thing Carl could think about was being afraid of this other caveman, and gathering all of the food in the garden for himself so that no other caveperson would ever come near his home again.... (to be continued).
I was thinking that somewhere along the line, we learned to be afraid that there might not be enough left over for us. Whether it be recognition, love, acceptance, food, security, ....whatever. And so, we began building our armor up... until today, where we are full of fears and our bodies respond accordingly- we must fight and be suspect of each other-because there might not be enough left for us.
But what if there was enough for everyone? What if there was enough to go around? What if we could get all of the love, acceptance, belonging, security, food, etc.? If Carl saw the other caveman eating the fruit, but noticed an entire orchard of trees to pick fruit from as well, Carl might have just shrugged, waved, smiled, and picked some of his own.
Since it appears that there in fact isn't enough of everything to actually go around in this world, how might we (if we want to that is) steer clear of letting fear drive our behaviors? How might we not allow ourselves to become calloused, suspicious, judgmental? I think that is where LOVE comes in. Love makes us do weird things.. right? Like being O.K. with the other caveman eating the last piece of fruit and actually be glad for him because we know it tastes so good and we know it would make us feel good inside if WE were the ones eating it. We transcribe our joy-filled feelings onto the other caveman. In those rare moments where we feel so "full" because of love, in those moments where we don't want to "wake up" from the experience we are having because we are so content, these are the moments when we are happy to allow another person the room to get their needs met. I think of a quote from the movie The Matrix:
The scene:
Neo, the hero, is growing in his stature, learning how to become "The One" to save the world. He goes to see the Oracle, the one who will confirm his identity. Before he goes in to see her, he is in a room filled with other "potentials". One possible candidate is a young boy who is bending a spoon with mind-power. Neo, with a puzzled look on his face, has a hard time believing what he is seeing. The boy, recognizing that Neo is struggling, speaks up.... "It is not the spoon that is bending, it is you. You must first realize that there is no spoon." I've found, and would like to share, with the hope to inspire someone out there, that when I have let go of my firm grip on myself and my needs, is when I find myself O.K. with helping others get theirs met. I can go hungry if I want to. I can be second if I choose to. I can choose to find more satisfaction in filling a need than filling my own when I want to. In those rare moments when I get tired of stuffing my face, when I am weary of biting and clawing, in those moments where I start to think... wait a minute "if there wasn't a spoon, I wouldn't care to bend it", that is when I am able to be flexible. That is where I revert back to a very organic place. A place where my body desires peace and to help others before I fight for myself. Somehow, maybe, if you can relate, maybe we have just forgotten that we prefer to feel peace? We remind ourselves that we don't like being afraid... that we don't like fear. We remember, somehow, that "the good life" must be one that doesn't make room for fear. And when we go back to this memory, this deep, deep memory, we prefer to imagine that there actually is enough... at least for the other person.
FORGIVENESS
ReplyDelete“Out of the mouth of babes”
Several years ago when we lived in Oregon, we purchased a new car from one of the local dealerships. I took Jeff and Jason with me
to pick up the new addition to our family. After signing the necessary paperwork the three of us headed to the shiny new ride in the dealer lot, excited to take her for a spin. Jeff, with his usual enthusiasm, hurriedly opened the car door and accidentally slammed it into the adjacent concrete wall denting the door. (I’m thinking,“Oh no, my brand new car!) I scolded Jeff for not paying attention and we continued on to our home. After a few minutes, Jeff looked at me with a sad face and said “Dad, will you forgive me?” I replied “I forgive you.” After another few minutes I again reprimanded Jeff for his carelessness. With his head hung down, he said “Dad, when you forgive you’re supposed to forget”
THAT PIERCED MY HEART LIKE A KNIFE…!!! How important the act of forgiveness is in our lives. Forgiveness is an “ACT” of excusing or pardoning others. In other words, we can choose to “ACT” on this concept or not. Forgiveness: “The thought of the heart, to cover over, to let loose from, to release.” This scenario has re-played itself over and over in my mind many times since that day so many years ago. A simple trip to an auto dealership can be a life changing experience…it was for me.
Larry (Dad) Lethcoe
It's interesting to note which types of experience make a profound impact on a person. Maybe it is exactly what we are lacking that when we see it present itself, becomes so meaningful to us? The profoundness of the meaning of forgiveness to someone who years to be forgiven? The lack of feeling "educated" might have hit me profoundly when I contemplated the logical prospect of actually becoming educated?
ReplyDeleteAny thoughts on this?
If this has some merit, it would be a great place to start in a journey toward "the good life". If we look introspectively into our lives and find a place of lack, a place of hardness, a place of willful ignorance, perhaps our profound awakening that will further our path to living well, will be birthed from doing, or acting upon, exactly that which we lack. If we desire peace, we show peace. If we desire courage, we show courage. If we desire to be forgiven, we forgive. If we desire to be educated, we teach. Perhaps in this circle, we make opportunity for new epiphanies to emerge.. to impact us... to steer us to an unadulterated, organic place?
The last comment is a good start, although I would like to suggest that we lack everything, and that, no matter what areas we become "strong" in by our own amazing will, we will never master everything, nor should we seek to master for the mere sake of being talented. I think we all lack in some places in the way of human talents, and I would assert we all have a general lack in that we are not perfect, and that although we have a desire to better ourselves, the truth is that on our own we can never achieve perfection. I think an important quetion that must be asked is "To what ends should we try to get to this organic place? Why bother? What grounds the importance of being in an organic place free of fear of not having, and free of fear of being open to those around you, and free of fear of rejection of the world? What is it that makes it significant? Is it for the sake of our humanity? What does that hold except that we die someday? Why should that motivate us to seek out this place of organic?" I put forth the idea that there is something more out there other than our own humanity that we need, and that this grounds the imoportance of the "circle" of trials listed above, not the circle nor our humanity in and of themselves. This raises the question I think we must ask as we go in this circle, as we approach the ability to be in a place of peace and clear thinking: WHY; why am I here, and to what ends to I try to understand myself? Can I understand everything about life just based on my own perception of the world, and what significance does that actually have if my life here is all there is? What makes my mind, my organic mind, my intrinsicly valued mind, my inexplicably complex mind... what makes it all worth it?
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ReplyDeleteInteresting take on things. For me, my mind does not find itself thinking in the terms listed above. However, here is where my mind went in response to the questions posed:
ReplyDeleteOne's own perception of the world is uniquely and wonderfully his or her own. It is the filter that he or she has been given to navigate through the unexplainable. There is a joining of one's perception and the unexplainable that fosters the creative process. To create, that is, to use rationale mixed with experiment, is human. Why seek an organic place? Because, I believe that it serves to foster living well, while we live. Death isn't negative to me. Death is part of the cycle. It serves to illuminate life. If I am going to live, I want to live well. I want the fruit of my thoughts and the evidence of my actions to promote health, to myself and others.
I don't want to go around thinking "why isn't there enough for me?" I'd rather look around and realize how much is really going for me, how much I really already have, and be thinking "how can I share all this goodness with everyone else?"
To me, living unorganically, is when I have placed my thoughts and actions in places where my growth toward my fullest potential is inhibited. On Maslow's hierarchy, it is getting stuck in a neurosis in the physiological, safety, belonging, or esteem needs. Living organically, for me, is not escaping pain and suffering, or jealousy, envy, anger, etc. It is learning to transcend it, even in full view of it, even using it as fuel toward transcendence. By transcendence, all I mean is overcoming the obstacles that would impeded purposeful growth toward the fullest potential of good, peace, health, service, contribution, truth, etc. Living organically is effective and efficient. Consider it in terms of diet. the proper foods produce efficient use of nutrients which in turn, produce effective energy. The same goes for actions and thoughts.
Living organically is not a self-serving act as much as it is getting in balance with life and living so that one's contribution is beneficial to one's environment, and consequently, beneficial to oneself, as one is part of one's environment.
Trials are necessary and needed to produce the good life... this is something I'd like to share my thoughts about in an upcoming post.